Have you ever thought about having this tagline? I am Looking Forward to Failure.
Probably not. Who would? We often link the failure to achieve a goal as coming up short versus others we wish to compare ourselves to. You get this converged potion of feelings including disappointment, resentment, envy and self-doubt. Most people’s lives and careers are based on seeking pleasure or avoiding pain. Most will bend over backwards putting themselves into a situation where they avoid failure because the perceived pain far exceeds any potential probability of success.
This is where we will stand out and make a difference in our lives. Every failure is a stepping stone to inevitable success. If you knew, in the bottom of your heart, that no short-term obstacle can prevent you from achieving your goals in life, wouldn’t you view failure in a different way? You bet!!!
Scott Edinger, the founder of Edinger Consulting Group, co-authored an excellent HBR(Harvard Business Review) blog titled, Get Ready to Fail. In it, Scott highlights 5 ways to address failure and make it part of the process rather than something to avoid.
1) Acknowledge the failure and put it in perspective
Research referenced in the blog shows that taking responsibility for your mistakes separates those who handle failure well from those who don’t.
2) Look for causes, not blame
Assigning blame means shifting control of a solution from yourself to others. Focusing on the cause(s) means you take control to prevent similar failures in the future.
3) Before you wrack your brain to think up an appropriate response, take a break.
We are not designed to operate under a 24/7 mode though when we confront failure, we cannot stop thinking about it. Engage in other pursuits. Spend time with loved ones or get some physical activity(endorphins). Let your mind wander. You will be surprised what 30 minutes to a few days of a mental break can do.
4) Get some help.
Feeling down is normal. Prolonged periods of depression and despair are not. If needed, find that friend, mentor or therapist to help you through this setback.
5) Refocus your efforts and take action.
Nothing will make you feel quite as good as taking action and finding even a small element of success in that action. It may take some time to reach that success, but you certainly won’t have any until you start trying.
Action of the Day
Identify if you are taking any risks in your career where you are risking failure. If not, identify an action you could take to make a difference. Make believe you failed miserably in your initial efforts. Create an outcome that is likely to cause you to feel let down, rejected or taking several steps back instead of forward. Now, pretending you have failed, go through the 5 steps above in your mind. Play the scenario out. Do you come out of the role playing exercise in a stronger place where the implications of a failure can bring you strength and one step closer to success? The pain of failure starts to be less significant than the pleasures of success from the experience.
Quote of the Day: “Don’t wait. The time will never be just right”….. Napoleon Hill